Luna's World

Hey there, this is Luna, writing from the confines of the Pillow of Shame.

I had a sore mouth recently.  It hurt a lot, but I'm a tough little cat, so I didn't make any fuss about it at all.

Until I went to the vet.  She found my sore teeth, and then she decided to make a big fuss.  "Luna needs to have those teeth pulled" she said.  "Abcess" she said.  "Clean her teeth" she said.

Hmph.

My idiot owners "Mom" and "That Girl" (I'm not using her name right now, I'm too angry at her.) They left me at the vets office a couple of days later to have my dental work done.

Do you know, they shave patches of my beautiful fur?
Or that they stuck needles into my delicate skin?
And that they prised my mouth open to pull my teeth?
They even used a scratchy thing to clean my gums.

Even worse, they told "Mom" and "That Girl" that I couldn't eat any kibble for 14 days.  Soft food is fine, but no kibble.

I don't like soft, wet food.  If I wanted soft, wet food, I'd kill one of those little mice that run around in the yard - and sometimes in our basement.

I have been on a hunger strike for 10 days now.  TEN DAYS!!!  DO YOU HEAR ME?????  I HAVEN'T EATEN IN TEN DAYS!!!!!!

Oh, they've given me food... turkey in gravy, chicken, salmon, liver, pumpkin bread...  You name it, they've put it down for me.

And I have repeatedly turned up my nose and tail at this nonsense.

I've slapped plates full of "food" across the room after they put it down.

I've come in and sat down with my back to the "food".

I have shaken my paws at this "food".

All to no avail.  They are not budging. They are standing firm.  They've even taken me back to the vet twice - TWICE I TELL YOU - to have her make sure that I am "doing okay".  I tried my hardest to look all weak and sickly, but when they stick a thermometer up your butt, it's hard not to be angry and indignant.

The vet even said that I had managed to gain weight.

Liar.

She doesn't know about my secret stash.  None of them do.  You see, I had been storing bits and pieces of food behind one of the back legs of the china cabinet.  I had even squirreled away a bag of treats and stored them back there.  When nobody is looking, I go and dig out a few pieces of kibble.  Last night, I pulled out one of the bags of treats that was hidden in a cabinet under the sink.

Don't worry.  I'm letting them know how upset I am.  I am waiting until I really, really have to pee.

The, I find something that belongs to them and let loose.

Very efficient was of winning the argument, hmmm?