Interview Madness

I've been on several interviews over the past few weeks.  You know, when you wonder what can go wrong?  It turns out quite a bit.....

Let's see what all has gone off the rails this week.  Remember, all of these interviews were panel interviews.

"Here's a computer.  You've got ten minutes to create and Excel spread sheet with all of these parameters."
 Here's the rub:  My computer screen is broadcast up onto the wall in the front of the room, and the computer I've been given is a state of the art Windows 10 machine.  The computer that I use at home and at work are both Windows XP machines.  I'm used to a much older version of Excel, and you could see it in my very clumsy attempts to figure out how to work the damn software and make the spread sheets as pretty as they wanted them to be.

"Given this bag of Legos, come up with 3 programs that you could do with a group of kindergarten children.  You have ten minutes."
Okay, so the bag had 20 Lego's, only one set of wheels, and 3 hinged pieces.  I asked if I had to have this EXACT bag of Lego's.  The answer was yes.  Yeah, I came up with 3 programs, my lessons were decent, but I usually have more than 10 minutes, and a library full of books at my fingertips in order to pull together a program.

As I was following the head of HR down the hallway, I brushed up against a table and the entire table - and everything on it - fell down.

"Tell me about your experiences working with electronic resource acquisitions."
As I worked my way through what I thought were my qualifications, the interviewer looks at me and says "So, no real qualifications, then."  As I stammered and attempted to expound upon what I had been doing, she rolled her eyes "That's not really what acquisitions is all about."  Funny, that's what I've been doing for the last couple of years, and my interviewer has never worked in any library. 

And finally, this weird - very weird - encounter from one interview.  I walked into the room, shook hands with the interviewer, and sat down.  She then proceeded to tell me about how hot her last office was - the average temperature in winter, and in summer.  And how she had to wear t-shirts and flip flops even in winter because it was so hot.  She then spoke at length about her current living arrangements, and then stood up, shook my hand, and escorted me back out the door.  No idea what the heck that was all about, but it was definitely right up there with the strangest interviews I have ever had.

I really don't enjoy interviewing for jobs.  I really hate getting out there and having to prove myself over and over again, but not really ever getting a job.  Searching for new jobs is difficult.  Very, very difficult.  It's time to move on to new challenges, but I really don't enjoy the interview process. 

I'd appreciate some positive thoughts sent my way during this very frustrating job search, if you can spare them!

Interview Madness

Have you ever gone for an interview where everything went wrong?  That happened to me earlier this week.

1) The interview was originally scheduled for Thursday afternoon.  Monday afternoon, I get a call asking me to change the interview to Tuesday.  They wanted me to come in during the morning - but I can't get off of work in the morning.  Long story short, we switched the interview to the afternoon.

2) I carefully dress at home, and leave for work.  It's wicked hot and humid, and I turn on the a/c in the van, only to find out that the air that we had fixed 2 weeks ago IS NOT WORKING.

3) Leaving work at noon, I realize I have a spot on my shirt.  My husband tells me now that it's not noticeable - but at the time, I panicked!!!  Add in a quick stop at Wal-Mart to pick up a clean white shirt.

4) Go to the nearest public library to change my shirt.  The bathroom by the front doors is broken.  Like some creeper, I had to go use the potties in the children's section.. Couldn't change and get out of there fast enough. 

5) Pull out the deep purple shirt I'm planning on wearing over the white shirt and realize it is deeply wrinkled and smells kind of funny.  Back to Wal-Mart to pick up some wrinkle release /deodorizing spray.

6) With all of the windows open, traveling 65 miles an hour down the highway, it is a balmy 85 hot and humid degrees in the car.  I look a mess.  My carefully coiffed hair looks like something even Medusa wouldn't claim.

7) Get lost twice on the way to the building.  It's so new it doesn't show up on my GPS.

8) Good news - the wrinkle release spray worked on my shirt.  Bad news - it's like 100* in the parking garage.  I find a library, and go inside and do my best with my hair.  I pull it up into barrettes.  I hate the look, but it's better than sweaty Medusa hair.  Due to the wonderful nature of the air conditioning in my car, my face is bright, bright red.  I sit at a table in the back corner of the library and fan myself with a periodical until 20 minutes before my interview begins.

9) Realize at the end of the interview that I forgot to bring my list of references with me.  Way to look professional, girl friend.  (You know, in case if the Medusa hair, bright pink face, and sweat stained shirt under a deep purple overshirt and the faint smell of sweat don't convey that professional look enough already.)

10) Finally leave the interview - it's close to 3:30 now, and I still haven't had lunch.  Find the Starbucks down the street library and have their most amazing Omega 3 Bistro Box - smoked salmon cream cheese, wheat free crackers, nut mix, endamame hummus and cucumber slices and have a veritable feast while enjoying their artificially cooled air.

I'm pretty sure that this interview was probably the WORST interview I've ever had.
You know, my current job isn't really all that bad....

A Job Interview

My very first job interview, I walked into a Deli with a help wanted sign on the door. I spoke with the owner over the counter, and 10 minutes later, I shook his hand and walked back out with instructions to report at 9 o'clock the next morning with my social security card, what clothes to wear, and I was told I would be there for the next 8 hours.  I guess times have changed since then.

Daughter had her first ever job interview last week - at our local library, shelving books.

I drove her to the interview and stayed in the car, because I really didn't think it would look good to have Mommy waiting for her inside while she interviewed.

She came back out 20 minutes later, a little shaken and a lot frustrated.  "Is every interview like that?"  She asked.

"I don't know, honey.  Tell me what happened."

She walked into a room, and was told to sit on one side of the table.  3 people sat on the other side of the table.  She had out her hand to shake hands, and no one even raised their hand, they just stared at her hand until she let it drop. They directed her to sit down while they began asking her a barrage of questions, never once making eye contact with her.  One interviewer was on the laptop the entire time, and daughter told me "now I know why every teacher complains about us on our electronics.  I really couldn't tell if she was listening to me or checking her e-mail."

Twenty minutes later, they thanked her for her time and told her "You'll hear from us within a week."

I mentioned this interview to some friends of mine.  I found out that they had interviewed 30 people for one minimum wage position.  I also heard that they already knew who they were going to hire- a family member of a current employee, but that they went through the public interview process to keep up appearances.  I'm still not sure what to believe since it was a casual conversation, and I'm willing to group it under hearsay or gossip.

Daughter got an email yesterday from the library, 10 days after her interview.  "Another candidate was chosen for this position."

I'm glad she had the learning experience of interviewing.

However, can I just say how upset I am that they subjected her (and a whole lot of other kids) to a 20 minute panel interview to shelve books for 10 hours a week for minimum wage?