Simple Rules for Being My Friend

I had an odd experience today.

I went with our high school robotics team to demonstrate our robot.  The place we went is a place where I used to work over 5 years ago.  I thought we had departed on good terms.  And I thought I was friends with many of the people there.  Several of those people are my facebook friends.

I want to clarify one thing.  This particular employer is one of our sponsors.  They donate time and money, and resources to our team, and they invited us to come in and share the robot, our trophies, and our pictures during their lunch hours, in their cafeteria.
So, I showed up with the kids and robot today and we set up our display and set to work, showing off the robot and talking to visitors about who we are, what we do, and how we go about doing this. 

I saw people that I recognized, and waved to them in passing.  I didn't speak to them.  I didn't interrupt their work.  All I did was the equivalent of a chin raise and a "sup" as they passed by.

They looked at me.  I KNOW they recognized me.  I saw the recognition in their faces.  And then, they hastily looked the other way.

I saw other people that I didn't know well, who I never thought of as friends who took the time to stop by, say hello, and ask how I was doing.  They talked to the kids about the robot.  They thanked me for coming out and followed up with an "It was so good to see you again!"

Strange.

I thought about it for a while.  Friendship requires a certain level of acknowledgement of the existence of the other person.  I understand that you may be working, but a head nod, a smile of recognition, or even a quick wave, just to say "HEY" is what is required to let the other sojourner in the world know that someone else out there knows you, recognizes you, and claims you as someone they know.

What I saw today baffled me.

It's odd, since many of them are my facebook friends, and I had posted on my page last night "We're going to be there tomorrow during lunch time!", and several of them had posted back "Great! Can't wait to see you and the robot." 

Now, the root issue here is that they are my facebook friends.  I have very strict guidelines on my facebook family.  I have my page locked down very, very tight.  If you are one of my facebook friends, you are either family or you are a friend who talks to me.  You are someone I'd go get a couple of beers at Chili's with some Friday night and shoot the breeze.  You acknowledge me, I acknowledge you, and we care about each other's lives and families. 

I don't have random friends on facebook.  I don't friend people just to up my friend count.  My facebook friends are my real life friends. 

This behavior bothered me more than I care to admit. 

I called one of the ladies involved tonight and said "Hey!  I missed seeing you today at lunch!"  (Even though I saw her walk by and avert her gaze as she walked past.)  "Oh, you know how it is", she replied "I'm just so busy I never even got down to the cafeteria.  I got a promotion, you know, and it keeps me hopping.  I really didn't know what busy was before.  Well, I've got to go now.  It was good talking to you.  We'll have to do this again sometime."

Long story short, I unfriended the parties involved on facebook.  Not to be mean, not to be spiteful. But because I realized a truth about our friendship.

You know what they say.  With a real friend, you can go years without seeing each other.  The first time you then get together, it's like nothing has changed.  You sit down and start talking as if it was yesterday. 

Friendship does take nurturing.  It does need to be watered with love and care. 

I'm off to go nurture a friendship now.

I believe I see a Chili's gathering in my very near future....

This post originally appeared in my now defunct "Mom's View" blog.  I moved it to this blog at the request of my kids, who wanted to have all of the various posts that accompanied their high school years in one place.  I've matched the publication dates here to their original post date.  If you're reading these posts, I sincerely thank you for taking the time to go back through them all! 

Jelly and Jam

I love making jelly and jam this time of year!  The fruit comes in so fast, I can barely keep up with it.

I tend to dedicate one day a week to jelly making.  And I really only make it at this time of the year.  My family only likes one kind of jam: triple berry.  A delicious concotion of Strawberry, Blueberry, and Raspberry, it is irresistible.  I stumbled upon the recipe not long after we moved into this house.  I had planted a stawberry bed, and we had an unbelievable number of blue- and rasp- berry bushes growing in the back yard. I found a recipe for triple berry jam in the Sure-Jel box when I was looking to make some strawberry jelly.  I figured I had nothing to lose, and an instant family favorite was born!

Jam really doesn't take much time to make.  It's an investment of a morning, or an entire day if you're really into it and making huge batches all at once.  You do need sugar, and you do need hours of uninterrupted time.  You aren't going to be able to leave to go to the store in the middle of the process, because once you lose your momentum, you just won't be able to get back into the jelly making.

We use our jelly all year long.  It goes onto our toast.  I buy only vanilla yogurt at the store, and we add a couple of Tablespoons of jam to the yogurt, stir, and I swear to you, it truly is the best yogurt you've ever had!  You know exactly what went into that jam, and you were the quality control agent, cooking and canning it on the same day - or the day after you picked it.  I don't care what you say, store bought jelly just can't hold a candle to home canned jelly.

You do have to make a one time investment in canning jars.  And you have to invest in lids.  But, considering I've been using some of these jars of ten years now, it was an investment well worth making!

If you've never made jam before, give it a whirl!  I'm posting my link from last year's jam post here.  As always- you MUST use a pectin agent of some kind.  Sure Jell, or Ball, or whatever you can find in your local store- the pectin makes the jam set.  Also - you MUST follow all directions and measurements exactly.  No short cuts, and no substitutions.  Canning food for long term storage is a science, and keeping the food safe and healthy to eat months later requires exact attention to detail.

So, go grab some fruit and enjoy your own home-made jelly!

(Just in case the link above doesn't work, here it is again)
http://librarynut-momsview.blogspot.com/2011/06/making-jelly.html

An Investment in Your Future

We've been touring college campuses up and down the East Coast since Saturday. While the campuses have begun to blur together in my mind, there is one thing that stood out: every college touted how important it was to make an investment in your child's education, and went to great lengths to tell us just how easy it is to get student loans. They brushed off annual tuitions of $40,000 (at state run, public universities) as trivial in comparison to the gains they would have through life, beginning as soon as they graduate. I'm not sure what most kids earn starting fresh out of college, but I'm pretty sure it's not enough to pay that debt off in a timely manner and start their lives out on the right foot.

I paid my own way through college. No debt when I graduated. Yes, I had to work while I took classes, but I have forever been able to say that I paid for my own education. I went in state, and I went to a nationally recognized school. My husband also worked his way through college in the co-op program - a decision that earned him a higher starting salary upon graduation.

So, we've been looking at schools with an eye on tuition and expenses. We want our kids to have an excellent education, but we don't want them saddled with debt, either. Graduating with $160,000 or more in debt is out of the question.

We've found absolute gems. Hidden within the maze of public universities, we are finding amazing campuses with fantastic programs at reasonable prices. (We found one today for $15,000 annually.). We've found great scholarship programs at some of these schools, and we've found amazing business partnerships. It's been an eye opening experience.

The true investment for our kids is going to be the investment in time, the time to make certain that they find an excellent, affordable education so that they can begin their journey into adulthood debt free.

We had some wicked, wicked weather in the Mid-Atlantic Region over Friday night.  Tornadoes tore up and down the area, but fortunately, no one was killed.   I watched the storm clouds roll in from our hilltop.  I was poised to run, but stayed outside,  fascinated by the interplay of the clouds.  

Funny story here.  The kids were at school in lock down.  The storm rolled in at 2, and the tornado warnings were announced at 2:15, prompting the high schools to hold dismissal (at 2:20) until after the storms rolled through.  This was the last day of school for the Seniors.

Just how much extra time did the Seniors get to spend in school on their very last day?  3 HOURS.  You read that right - THREE EXTRA HOURS.

You know, that's just not right.

The storm clouds gather.

The sky is looking ominous.

More clouds.  I watched these little clouds form into a funnel, break apart, and form up again.
They finally broke up, but it was a sight to behold!

Random Pictures

Some random pictures from my camera phone from the past few weeks:

We had an empty bowls fundraiser at the high school.
The art classes made the bowls, and had a soup lunch.
Diners paid for a bowl of soup, and got to keep a bowl.
All proceeds went to our local food bank.
Here, you can see our many bowls!

This cute little mousey was a desert at a teacher's lunch last week.
Isn't he cute?
Chocolate covered cherry on an open Oreo cookie,
Hershey kiss and almonds.
Someone is amazing patient and detail oriented!
These guys were so cute!

Mango Salsa.   We found the recipe on Pinterest, and had it for dinner.
Isn't it beautiful?

The pinata for the robotics end of year dinner.  The kids named him Alfred.

Alfred and Tiger make friends!

Taking the Cats to the Vet

I took the cats to the vet today.  It was a traumatic experience for everyone involved.

The cats like to go outside early in the morning, so I took the precaution of locking each of them into a separate room overnight with a bowl of food, a bowl, of water, and a litterbox.  I was hoping to get a stool sample from each of them overnight.  I should have known better...

A half hour before it was time to go to the vet, I tracked down the animal carriers and went after Luna (the more agreeable one) and put her in her box.  No fights with that little girl, she's always ready for an adventure.  I scoped out her litterbox, but she had made absolutely no deposits over night.

I went after Tiger next.  One huge catfight later, I had two bloody gashes on my hand and a cat that had buried himself under the middle of the bed.  I finally dislodged him from the bed, only to turn around and find that Luna had let herself out of her carrier and was firmly lodged in Tiger's carrier.

Actually, this turned out to be a very good thing!  Once Tiger saw Luna in his carrier, he immediately lunged from my arms, and started squabbling with Luna, until she left the carrier and he could get in.

I locked his carrier and attempted to get Luna into hers.  No sooner did I shut her door than she began prizing open the weak edge at the top.  Desperate, I found a length of blue ribbon and tied her cage together so she couldn't open it again.

5 short minutes later, we were in the waiting room at the vet's office.

When we were called back, the tech decided to go with Luna first.  (Remember, she's the agreeable one.)  She purred through her initial exam, preened herself, and generally had a great time.  When the tech told Luna "OK, I'm done with you, I need to see Tiger next", Luna hopped right off of the table, walked over to one of the chairs, and assumed her sphinx pose while watching Tiger.

It took both of us to dislodge Tiger from the carrier.  We had to turn it upside down to get him out.  He hissed, he fussed, and he made snarly noises the entire time the tech looked at him.

Then came the fun part:  The vet came in!

Remember, Luna is still sitting on the chair, purring away and swishing her tail.  She was enjoying the spectacle!

The vet felt Tiger's abdomen.  Tiger growled.  She checked his teeth.  He hissed.  She gave him his shots.  Tiger made snarly noises at her.  The minute she finshed and said "OK Tiger, I'm done with you, you can go now" he jumped down off of the table and ran into his carrier.

The vet looked at Luna and said "OK Luna - you're next!"  (I swear I am not making this up!)  Luna hopped off of the chair and sauntered over to the table.  The vet picked her up and put her on the table, attempting to feel Luna's abdomen.  Luna immediately rolled over onto her back, squiremed around, and got her head under the vet's hand.  The vet tried to check Luna's teeth.  Luna immediately rolled over onto her back, squirmed around, and put her back under the vet's hand.  While the vet was trying to keep Luna still long enough to give her the shots, she asked me "Did you manage to get a stool sample from her?"

"No", I answered.  "She hasn't done anything at all in the last 12 hours.  I had her locked in a room overnight with the litter box, and she didn't even pee."

It's like that was the cue that cat had been waiting for.  With an insane gleam in her green eyes, she let loose at both ends, giving the vet both kinds of samples.  Luna hopped down off the table and hopped back into her box. 

We all stood there, too stunned to speak for a few minutes.

"Well", said the tech, "At least we have our samples!"

Those cats!  I guess we know who's really in charge!

This post originally appeared in my now defunct "Mom's View" blog.  I moved it to this blog at the request of my kids, who wanted to have all of the various posts that accompanied their high school years in one place.  I've matched the publication dates here to their original post date.  If you're reading these posts, I sincerely thank you for taking the time to go back through them all! 

Several Comedies of Error

I've been subbing a lot the past few weeks.  Jobs have been plentiful... and the motivation that says "You won't get a paycheck for June, July, or August" has kept me moving pretty quickly on taking up the jobs.  Today is a rare day off, so I thought I would share my comedy of errors over the last few weeks.

I normally only substitute in K-3rd grade, because that is my area of certification, and it is the age group I am best at teaching.  Unfortunately, several of the jobs I took over the past couple of weeks were "supplementary", which is the grab bag of the substitute world.  I didn't know what I was getting into until I walked in the door of the building that morning.  Surprise!!

I spent one particularly memorable afternoon in 5th grade.  The teacher had left us with a DVD to watch, and had trained the kids how to turn it on and get it to go.  Her final words to me before she left "You don't touch anything.  Only she does." (pointing to a child in the class)  Okie Dokie!  We finished up the lessons she had left, and then we attempted to start the movie.  Nothing happened.  The girl tried again, and nothing happened.  The kids became very, very helpful.  (overly helpful) Yet still, nothing happened.  I called down to the main office, and they sent an Assistant Principal down to "show us" how to fix it.  He ended up calling the media specialist, who then ended up calling the technology guy from the county who was in the building working on the network. So, while all of the great minds were working on getting the DVD to run, what were the kids doing?  We started playing "Simon Says".  Twenty minutes later, the crew of four adults looked at me and said "It's not working."  (Insert evil teacher/mom glare here.)  I asked, "so what do I do?"  "Oh, said the AP, you follow the plans she left you."  I handed him the plans that said in clear letters: "Watch movie.  The kids know how to turn it on.  Dismissal begins at 3:15".  Thank heavens, the teacher next door poked her head around the corner at that moment and said "We're just getting ready to start the movie.  Why don't you bring them in here?" 

I spent one day with an assistant teacher who couldn't remember my last name.  She kept calling me Mrs. Jones, no matter how many times I corrected her.  Finally, I gave up and let her call me Mrs. Jones for the rest of the day.  I found out yesterday that she calls every sub in her room Mrs. Jones. 

I was reading a book aloud to a group of students, sitting in the rocking chair when *CRASH* the entire rocking chair broke apart underneath me!  There I was, one shocked woman, sitting amidst the remains of a rocking chair!  (Once I finally caught my breath and figured out how I ended up on the floor, we called the story finished and went outside for a quick extra recess.)

On my way out of the building yesterday, I was accosted by a teacher that I subbed for last week.
"Did you hear the news?"  she asked.  "No, what?"  I replied.
"Seven kids in my class have lice.  They found them the day after you subbed for me.  You need to get checked before you leave today."

What a wonderful, wonderful couple of weeks it's been!

This post originally appeared in my now defunct "Mom's View" blog.  I moved it to this blog at the request of my kids, who wanted to have all of the various posts that accompanied their high school years in one place.  I've matched the publication dates here to their original post date.  If you're reading these posts, I sincerely thank you for taking the time to go back through them all!