It's Been A While!

I was looking back through my most recent posts, and I realize that the most recent updates include the girl moving out.  In January of 2020.  So, let's catch up.

Mom celebrated her 90th birthday earlier this year. She had a pacemaker put in during the month of April, and she is doing better now. She is living in a Senior Apartment. She is still mentally alert, and while her eyesight is failing, she still enjoys talking to people and reminiscing about old times.

My step mother appeared out of nowhere last April and asked me if I wanted my Dad's stuff. I hadn't heard from her since Dad died - in 2008. 12 years. I met her niece in a parking lot, and she gave me a trunk full off Dad's stuff. Old pictures, slides, and his military records. It wasn't much, but I'm glad to have it all! Her niece told me that Step Mom was in a nursing home, and I sent her cards and letters every month. I never heard back from her. But I didn't expect to hear back from her.  

So, in April, when Mom was in the hospital, her heart was pausing and then restarting. When I was talking with the cardiologist about what was happening I said "You know, if my step-mother was dead, I would swear her ghost was standing over Mom, shoving her spirit back in her body and giving her CPR and yelling "NOT YET DAMMIT - HE'S MINE, ALL MINE".  Mom went back for surgery, and I was bored. I decided to google search my step mother for the heck of it. And that's how I found out that she had passed away. On January 2 of 2021. 

In late April, my Mother in Law passed away. She had a massive stroke. But, she was at a table with her friends, eating lunch and laughing when it happened. It's comforting to think she was with other people.

My sister in law's mother passed on Christmas Eve.

My daughter got really sick, and ended up in the ER after she couldn't eat or drink anything. An endoscope found that she had gastritis. The summer was tough on her as she struggled with the bland limited diet prescribed by her doctor to help heal her gut.

I needed to vent, and thanks for listening. After this last 9 months, I needed to get it all out.

Thanks so much for reading!

New Roof on the House

 We've been here for 16 years this week.  We bought the house from my In-Laws.  It's a sturdy little house that is now considered to be "Mid Century Modern".  Who knew?  I just call it a Rancher, but the last real estate agent who came through here looking for homes for his client by knocking on doors told me this house is a "Classic Example of Mid Century Modern Architecture".   That's right.  Our 51 year old money pit is "A Classic". 

Over the 16 years we've been here there has been work, more work, and still more work we've had to do as things have needed to be upgraded or - the never-ending project - getting their junk that they left behind out of the house.

One project that has been on our list for a few years now is the roof.  We knew it was at least 15 years old, but we thought it was 20.  No matter how old it was, it was looking rough and several shingles had blown off last summer.  Getting the roof replaced before winter was a high priority for us.  

We found a company we liked. We interviewed three companies.  The first company came highly recommended, but when we called their references, the people we spoke with always said "He's great!  Whenever it rains, he comes over and fixes the leaks without complaint!"  (Umm..no.)  The second company was one that we had contracted with when I was on Trustees as the church.  While they were highly qualified, so were their rates. They had a flat rate to replace the roof.  But they charged an arm and a leg for everything from nails to running around the property with a metal detector to pick up nails when the job was done.  It turns out we saved the best for last.  They came with multiple positive reviews from people we know and trust, as well as from the random references that they gave us to call.  And so, back in October, our roof was replaced.  But not without a hitch or two.  Because what is a home improvement project without a hitch?

It turns out the roof on our house had never been replaced.  It had just been shingled over, that layer of shingles was 25 years old.  The original layer of 50 year old shingles was still on the roof.  There were places where the roofs had started to leak, so plywood underlayment had to be replaced.  It was a big job that stretched out over two days.  The roofer scheduled us for two days, but then cancelled once because it looked like it would rain the second day, and he wanted two dry days in a row to do everything that needed to be done.  

I was telecommuting the day that first day.  Let me tell you, it was LOUD!  But I really enjoyed watching all of the old shingles coming down off the roof. I sat here mesmerized by the efficiency with which the team tackled the roof.

Just look at all the new plywood over the front door!

We now have a brand spanking new roof.  But you know what?  The woodwork is looking really bad.  Really, really bad.  That's really moved up on the list of things that we need to get taken care of in the next 18 months.

A Nifty New Pacemaker

 2 weeks ago, my Mom passed out while she was getting dressed.  She lives in a Senior Living Apartment, and help was immediately available.  They sent her to the hospital "just in case" it was something major. I got the call from the hospital, letting me know she was there AND that I could come see her.  You know things are bad when you are still in the midst of a global pandemic and the hospital invites you to come inside to be with a patient.

By the time I got to Mom, she had passed out again.  It turns out her heart was "pausing" for several seconds and then restarting again.  When I walked in, they had just put in a temporary pacemaker and were waiting for her vitals to stabilize enough that they could put her under a light anesthesia to install the permanent pacemaker.

Mom has her permanent pacemaker now. For the first time in a couple of months, she is strong enough to sit up for periods of time.  She is currently in a rehab hospital.  (Where we are NOT allowed to visit, so you know she's okay.)  She hopes to be back in her apartment by the end of the month.

The doctor mentioned that if this had been normal times, they most likely would have caught the heart issue at a regularly scheduled check up.  But since they've only been doing tele-health visits for the last year they missed it.

As our doctors offices open back up, it's time to go see our doctors.  Get our screenings and get our wellness checks. And if something doesn't feel right to you - call your doctor and insist on seeing them in person.  You need to take care of you. 

My 2021 Resolutions

I like to keep a list of resolutions on the blog.  It helped to keep me accountable and  helped me keep track of my goals - what I wanted to do and whether or not I actually got them accomplished during the year.  I had a few goals in 2020.  Those all went out the window in March.  I don't even want to talk about those goals anymore.  But, this is 2021, and we are all set for a new series of goals.  So, here they are.  It's a short list this year. 

1) Get away with my husband twice this year. 

The timing on this will depend upon CoVid restrictions being lifted and us getting vaccinated.  We are waiting.

2) Visit middle child in Kansas.

We are planning to drive out in September, if CoVid restrictions have been lifted.

3) Visit all of the state parks in Maryland.

I have my State Parks Pass!  Waiting for the weather to warm up!

4) Get one more stamp in my National Parks Passport.

Where to go?  There are a lot of National Parks close by.  But the NPS has not yet put the stamps back out at the parks.

5) Lose 10% of my body weight.

I've packed on the CoVid 19.  I've lost 3 of those pounds.  16 more to go.  And then heck, why not go for a few more pounds after that and hit 10% of my body weight?  I've done it once before.  It's time to do it again.

6) Get a storage unit and move stuff there to sort it out.

We had stuff we needed to get out.  And then we cleaned out my Mom's house when we moved her to Assisted Living and then we cleaned out my MIL's condo and apartment and THEN the oldest child moved back in.  AND THEN my Step-Mother's niece called me and gave me BOXES of my Dad's stuff.  You know, my Dad.  Who passed away over 12 years ago.  (There's another story...)  This house looks like a real life episode of Hoarders.

7) Do a minor home improvement project.

There's a lot to choose from.  Which one will we pick?  Fixing the fence line in the back?  Getting the wood trim on the house painted?  Replacing the floor in the utility area in the basement? Hiring the tree guys to come out and get rid of the brush piles in the back? Having someone come out and landscape the front of the house?

8) Visit my cousins in Texas (a trip postponed from 2020.)

I'm crossing my fingers.  I was supposed to visit them in April 2020.  As of right now, I have an in person conference for work that is tentatively set to be in San Antonio late this year.  I would love to fly there and then spend a few extra days with the cousins.  Again, everything depends on CoVid.

9) Get my kids and all of my sister's kids together in the same place at the same time.

This would be the first time since Thanksgiving 2017.  I hate when they grow up and move out. It makes getting together so much more challenging.  We need this to happen this year.

Rock State Park

We have amazing State Parks in Maryland.  Each one of them has something that makes it a unique destination.  Years ago when I was teaching the girl how to drive, we drove past this place called "Rock State Park".  We didn't stop - we were very lost, and the thought of pulling over somewhere and potentially getting more lost was something that the freaked her out beyond words.  (Yes, I did have a cell phone with GPS, which I was following in an attempt to get to Belcamp.  I'm still not certain how it ended up directing us to Rock State Park from the Baltimore area...)  But I digress..

One beautiful day last year, husband and I set out to go see the park.  We packed our lunch and a picnic blanket and our thermos of water.

The day did not disappoint.  We started early, hoping to beat the worst of the crowds and be able to keep as much distance between us and other people as possible.  

We began with a hike up to the King and Queen Seats.  I don't know how we stumbled onto the easy hike, but we did, somehow hiking down less than half a mile from the parking lot.  The views are stunning.  It made me think of the Lord of the Rings - you know, the spot where Frodo goes and is attacked by Boromir just before the Fellowship falls apart?  It felt like you could see forever and a day.

 

As this particular spot in the park began to fill up with people, we hiked back to the car and pulled over by the side of the road by a scenic pull off.  We walked down to the water and what did we see?  This amazing, beautiful area full of butterflies puddling in the shallow water.  It was magical.  There were so many more butterflies than this photo captures.

 

We finally stopped in a picnic area for lunch around 11.  We pulled out our blanket and our basket and watched the river flow by and kids playing.  What a wonderful way to spend a day!

What a beautiful view!

Palm Sunday

 For those of us who are Christians, today is Palm Sunday.  Today marks the beginning of Holy Week.  This is the day when we commemorate Jesus' triumphal entry into Jerusalem.

Ten years ago, I was teaching 7th grade Sunday School with one of my best friends.  We decided that the Sunday School needed to have their very own re-enactment of Jesus' triumphal entry into Jerusalem.  We had taken our thought to the Education Director who hopped onto our plan and made it even better.  She was going to arrange for a Donkey.

Palm Sunday arrives.  All of the kids are lining the long hallway in the Education wing - they all have palm branches, and they have put "cloaks" down on the floor.

Our kids are dressed, and Andy was thrilled that he was going to be playing the part of Jesus.  The rest of the class were his disciples.

We go to the end of the hallway, and we see a wagon - you know, a kid's Radio Flyer Wagon.  And there's a pony on top.  A rocking horse pony from the preschool.  It is placed precariously atop the wagon and held down with a bungee cord.

Excited beyond words, Andy hops onto the rocking horse, and as he attempts to squeeze his very big 7th grade self into this rocking horse designed for a 4 year old, the kids in the hall start waving palm branches and cheering.  Before Andy is completed settled in, his "disciples" begin pushing and pulling the wagon down the hallway.  As the wagon bumped over each and every cloak, the horse moved just a little more off kilter.  

Halfway down the hallway, the fire doors were open, but there was a rough junction on the floor, because that is the spot where the new and old buildings were joined.  When the wagon hit that spot, the rocking horse slipped off on one side and Andy was holding on for dear life, trying to keep himself from crashing off and onto the kids standing on the side of the halls.  As the kids pushing and pulling saw everything start to slide, they decided the solution was to move FASTER down the hallway.

As they burst through the doors at the end of the hallway, Andy did a "tuck and roll" into the grass.

The kids fell on the ground, laughing so hard tears were running down their faces.  

It was the very best Palm Sunday I've ever had. I have a picture of that group that shows up in my Facebook Memories every year.  You can see the grins on the kids faces, and Andy is perched atop the riding horse which was entirely too small for a 12 year old.

I ran into Andy recently.  He's a grown man now.  As we were catching up, he told me that that Palm Sunday Parade is still his all time favorite Sunday School memory.  Palm Sunday has been one of his favorite Holy Days ever since.  

To my friends who are Christian, I hope you have a memorable Holy Week.

My Mom

 Mom has had a rough few years.  

She had a Colostomy after her Colon ruptured about 6 years ago.  Her bowel was obstructed by a tumor.  If she'd ever had a colonoscopy, she would still have her colon. Alas, she refused and ever since, she has pooped through a bag on her stomach.  If you've ever wanted a good reason to get a colonoscopy, there it is.  No control over that bodily function, and you wear a bag to collect your waste 24/7.  She survived the surgery, spent 6 weeks in the ICU and another 4 in rehab before she could come home. (PSA - get a colonoscopy.)  She's learned to live with it, but she's never been happy about it.  She even named her bag after my Dad's second wife... so there's that.

Let's fast forward to Election Day, 2018.  All of this happened just after I stopped writing for this blog, and I had no idea how to even put everything into words.  Let's see what I can do.  As far as I knew, Mom was on blood pressure medication and was taking it every day.  My sister was living with her.  (OK, another story for another day.)  We BOTH though Mom was taking her blood pressure medication daily.

Election Night, they were watching the returns, when Mom got up to go to the bathroom and crashed to the floor.  She couldn't stand, she couldn't walk, and she was slurring her words.  My sister called 9-1-1, and they came out to the house and took Mom to the hospital.  I got a call around 11 pm telling me that Mom had fallen and everything should be fine.  I asked if she needed me to come down - it was a 2 hour one way drive) and she told me to get some sleep, and she'd see me in the morning.

6 am, I get a call from my sister that they were transferring her to the hospital in Arlington from where she was just north of Richmond.  I drove down to the hospital, found out that mom wasn't there yet and sat down to wait in the cafeteria.  My sister had been with Mom through the night and was headed home to get some sleep.  Mom arrived around 11 am, and they began to run a bevy of tests on her.

She'd had a stroke.  When she was admitted to the first hospital and run her bloodwork, it showed indications of a looming cardiovascular event.  So they transferred her to a larger hospital with a higher level of care.  She had another stroke that first night in Arlington before they got her blood pressure under control.  She lost control of one side - I think it was the left side - things have begun to run together.  Whichever side it was - it was the one that didn't affect speech.

Once she was stabilized, they moved her to a rehab hospital where she stayed for the next month while she relearned how to walk, eat, and dress herself.  Eventually, she went back home and moved in with my very overwhelmed sister.  We hired nurses to help her 24/7 for the first few months and then cut down on the amount of time they were there as she improved.  She had another stroke a few months later, and then several TIA's.  It was time to move her someplace where she could get the assistance that she needed.

Over July 4 weekend in 2019, we moved her to a place in Arlington.  She's close enough to Washington that she can see the Capitol and the White House on the other side of the river.

Moving day was awesome. Tempers were high, as you can imagine.  We couldn't find a moving van that day, so we all showed up with our various assorted cars to move her things.  My sister and her boyfriend showed up in two cars.  My daughter and her boyfriend showed up in another.  I showed up in my CRV.  (Did I mention husband was out of town?  Of course he was....)  AND, we had several of our friends from college who showed up to help.  

Let's give a huge hand to lifelong friends here.  We graduated from college in the last century.  NONE of us are young anymore.

And so we piled everything we could into the cars and moved her an hour and a half up the road.  I had her in my car in the front seat.  My sister was behind me, and my daughter and her boyfriend were behind her, and our assorted friends were behind them.

I had the box springs for her mattress on the roof of my CRV.  Keep in mind, I have no roof rack on my car.  I put that grippy stuff that you use on the bottoms of kitchen cabinets to keep glasses from breaking across the roof of my car, rollling the ends in through the back seat windows.  We put the box springs on upside down, and then we bungee corded the whole thing down - with cords across the front row and middle row.  I had the clasps just over my head.  It was something I tried not to think too hard about.  We then tied a heavy rope from my front bumper over the top of the car and around the back bumper - think tying down a kayak.

My sister had the mattress.  And she wanted it on the roof of her car.  She refused to have any bungee cords over her head, and she didn't want to damage her car with ropes from front to back.  So, the mattress was bungee corded through the second row of windows in her SUV.  Just the second window.

We set out in a caravan.  Our route took us straight up I-95.  If you're not familiar with 95 through Northern Virginia, be very thankful.  That traffic is some of the worst traffic in the nation.  I stayed in the left lane, put my blinkers on, and kept my speed to around 60 miles an hour.  My sister pulled over into the leftmost lane, and my daughter pulled behind her.

Do you know what happens when you hit a major interstate with a mattress strapped down only across the middle and hit NoVa traffic speeds?  It turns into a taco.  The mattress stands straight up and bends almost all the way back like a taco, held down only by the bungee cords.  

Daughter dropped back to leave room between her car and my sister's car so that if the mattress did fly off, she'd have a chance to stop or veer onto the shoulder.  And she put her blinkers on.  But my sister didn't slow down - she kept charging right on up the highway.  When she slowed because of traffic, the mattress would flatten out and become a quesadilla.  All the way up the highway - taco/quesadilla, taco/quesadilla.

My daughter told me that a couple of times they had cars who pulled in front of her, then the mattress would pick up again and look like it was taking flight and all of a sudden, they'd veer back over to the other lane.  

Eventually, we got mom safely moved into her new place.  The furniture was installed.  We helped her unpack and hang pictures. The staff took her down to dinner so that she could meet her new table mates.  When the day was over, we drove home through Washington DC so that we could at least look at the festivities on the Mall and all of the happy people celebrating.

Honestly, I will never forget the sight of the mattress taco in my rear view mirror, passing me on the left and flying past me up the highway.